Ugh, it’s a new year and I’m dreading it. There’s just so much pressure to be BETTER! I’ve spent so many years “starting anew” and failing a few days in that I’m not buying it anymore. Most likely, by the time you’re reading this article, I’ve already failed my resolution.
I prefer not to make resolutions, I don’t believe in them. I don’t think the “new you” begins once a year, I’d like to think it’s every morning. If I had to wait ’til January of every year to be a better mom, stop eating sugar and start exercising, by Jan. 4 I’d be a fat pig, who never makes dinner and spends the rest of the year on the couch. (Side note: That sounds awesome.)
I make lots of mistakes, every day. On Christmas Eve, I screamed something about “relish and pizzelles,” stormed out of the house and hid in my car drinking Starbucks for 30 minutes. Hopefully, that was forgiven.
My son attempted to leave on Christmas Eve day, when the presents weren’t wrapped, my daughter’s presents hadn’t arrived and I ran out of 20 percent off coupons from Bed, Bath & Beyond. I glared at him, calmly, while whispering, “I may physically attack you if you attempt to leave.” I’m not proud. I’m hoping this was forgiven. Perhaps I’ll hear about this in therapy years from now, but the next morning I said, “Let’s start again … let’s start anew!” and I felt better.
Juggling motherhood, work, a sex life (ha!) and a company that makes dirty board games isn’t easy. I prefer to take my days one at a time, not one year at a time AND I don’t think that it takes much to make some real changes in life. I think we have been programmed to make these sweeping changes, when frankly, it’s been the small changes in my life that have had the most impact.
Every Christmas I buy new toothbrushes for our whole family. Give me a new toothbrush and I’ll show you a woman who can conquer the world.
This year, I felt the same way about bras. Recently I read an article that said your bra should be replaced every 6 to 9 months. WHAT?! I’ve had mine for at least five years! I think you only really know you need a new bra when you try one on, so this year I decided one of my Christmas presents was going to be a new bra. (I buy all my own Christmas presents because, duh.)
I went to Victoria’s Secret (there was a sale), tried a bra on and I was amazed. My boobs were in roughly (I use this term loosely) the same place I saw them when I was in my 20s. I was a new woman! I thought about all the tops I could wear now. I questioned my life, job and underwear. (It was too much for me to take on searching for new underwear, so I quickly paid and headed home.)
On my way, I thought about how much better my life would be after I started wearing my new bra and I realized that I didn’t need a fancy vacation, job promotion or pay raise to feel fancy. I just needed a new bra … a $35 bra (which by the way is the most I’ve ever spent on a bra, especially since you can get four bras at Kohl’s for that much, but I digress.)
I applied this philosophy of pampering myself, just a bit, to all my presents this year. I wanted to enjoy life a little more in 2018 by making small investments in myself. My presents under the tree included my bra, fancy $12 oven mitts from Target, new mascara that makes it look like I have eye lashes and a top. There’s nothing truly fancy there but it was all things that make me smile every day.
Years ago I worked as a warm-up comic for The Nate Berkus Show and while I couldn’t afford a lot of the furnishings they used on the show I remember him saying, “Don’t buy furniture or décor if you don’t love it. You should surround yourself with things in your life that make you smile every time you see them.” I agree with that. I used to want a lot of stuff. Now, I like LESS stuff and more TIME.
I say to you, women of South Jersey, welcome in the New Year with a new bra. Buy some panties. Get something that makes you feel fancy. We live in a rancher style house and I always tell my kids that one day, when I’ve hit the big time, I’m getting a towel warmer! I know it’s stupid because they look at me like, “Huh?” I guess they were expecting something fancier, but honestly, if I can get a nice, clean, warm towel when I step out of the shower I would feel like the Queen of England! (I bet Elizabeth has a towel warmer.)
Either way, make your wishes, your resolutions and whatever, but go buy a bra. I promise you, it will last longer than your resolution.
Published (and copyrighted) in South Jersey Magazine, Volume 14, Issue 10 (January, 2018).